Patience....

I am so glad I decided to come back and start blogging again... I am so inspired by all of you who are walking down this same path of ttwd.  Honestly, sometimes, I'm thinking it's all in the mindset.   I have to keep reminding myself of the things that I would like my S to guide me through and the more seriously I take it, the more real that I make it in my life, the sweeter our life really is.  My husband enjoys our life when we are practicing Dd... he might not be comfortable with the "punishment" part yet, but I believe that will all come in time.

You know, I was thinking the other night, and it totally dawned on me.  I have asked my husband to hold me accountable for different aspects in our daily life.  This isn't something that he is horrified by nor does he think it's stupid or any other negative thoughts about it.  But as uncomfortable as it was for me to go to him and ask to be guided through our married life... how un-nerving it must be to be expected to "preform", never really having done such a task.  Not that he is unwilling to stand up and meet the challenge that I have asked of him, but this being all new...  My HOH likes the idea that he is my hero... I love that I think of him as my hero as well.... but that also puts some pressure on them to "preform" like a "hero" and do what they do ever so perfectly.  I'm not looking for perfection, just to know that I'm very much loved and that he has the steering wheel.

As I was contemplating our life as we are easing ourselves back into ttwd.  I realized that I was really trying hard to keep the mindset even when we weren't practicing... but I did notice that sometimes I'd get angry and not really care what was coming out of my mouth aimed right toward him.  I don't think he is missing that...LOL

Anyway... I haven't had a "punishment" as yet... since we have been back to giving this another go of it.  I'm trying not to rush things.  I look back and realize that I used to "compare" our relationship with other blogs that I was reading and I see how unfair I was being to both of us.  This is our path, and it's going to look different than others.  Hindsight is so 20/20.  That is not that I haven't been getting a few spankings here and there.  During our intimate play time he has been spanking me.  Not horribly hard... way enough to get my attention and puts in my mind that he is willing to be the boss..... making me want to submit to him that much more!  I just melt like butter when his hand is on my behind! ;o)

So it came to me that what better way for him to "practice" this spanking thing than when we are playing.  I was thinking that when Blondie commented that she and her husband were actually playing the spanking scene before Dd.... so he had already become comfortable with "preforming", but she says that he still had a problem when it came to "punishment" spanks.  That is so nice to know!!!

Patience.... this is what it all seems to boil down to.  Being patient with ourselves.... him with him and me with me.... but then also patience with each other.

On a different note... to the anonymous who insists on being a jerk... screw you... get your own blog...  you may not be impressed my us "submissive" women.... but I really don't care... take it up with your shrink and write your own journal... this is mine and you won't get another second of my time or thoughts!

To everyone else... have a great day!! xxx